


Destroy me

by Ishyc6h12o6



Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: Bullying, Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Sexual Harassment, Mental Health Issues, Past Child Abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-13 07:54:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29523243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ishyc6h12o6/pseuds/Ishyc6h12o6
Summary: Karma Akabane can do what ever he wants to Nagisa Shiota. He does not fight back. He can’t, not after what he did. He deserves this.Nagisa can’t hate Karma Akabane. Even after all he’s done, all he’s doing. Because he remembers his best friend. One day he’ll feel safe with him again.Karma takes joy in hurting Nagisa to hide his own insecurities and fears. When he takes things too far he’s forced to remember his friendship and face the consequences of his actions.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 16





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello thank you for choosing to read this. It’s 4 am where I live and I’m very tired. Here is me projecting onto fictional characters.
> 
> So this is AU, there is no E-class or assassination. Just too boys, a lot of angst, violence and random instalments of fluff.
> 
> Nagisa still has bloodlust though. Just to keep it interesting.

Nagisa was very careful where he looked. Looking into eyes could be seen as a challenge. Looking at the chest made him feel tiny and pathetic. Looking down might imply he was looking at a certain body part in particular. None of these scenarios ended well.

So he looked slightly over Karma’s shoulder and focused his attention on a sink. That was the safe choice.

Karma leant over him, grinning. He knew exactly how much Nagisa hated this. He even bent his back slightly. Showing how easy it would be to over power him completely. Make him disappear.

The bathroom wall was cold against his back but he had no room to move away. Karma’s face kept coming closer closer closer. His hands gripped Nagisa’s wrists, keeping them tucked by his side. He knew bruises would form again. The last ones had only faded a day or two ago. Karma seemed to have this internal monitor for his injuries.  
Oh look! He’s healed! Better fix that!

At least it wasn’t a choke hold this time.

“Well Nagisa? What do you have to say for yourself?”

Nagisa didn’t respond. Karma did not want a response. That was learned the hard way.

“Didn’t I tell you not to move around on your own? What if something happened? Someone much less forgiving than myself! What could they do to you?”

“I can’t ask people to come to the bathroom with me.” Muttered Nagisa.

Karma’s fist clenched. Wrong thing to say.

“You care more about what other people say?”

Hands touching his hair, gently unwinding his braids. Bowing his head to hide behind his fringe.  
If I ignore him he’ll go away. He’ll get bored. He’ll stop.....

Karma’s fist slammed into the wall beside his head. Smiled at his flinch. His fingers unclenched and trailed over his cheek. Lifted his chin. Slowly traced the dark circles under his eyes.  
Nagisa shuddered. Not knowing when Karma would strike. Scratch at his eyes, scrawl his skin off was the worst part of this.  
Almost the worst.

He touched his lips. Nagisa pressed them together but Karma worked two fingers inside. Pride Nagisa’s mouth open.  
Nagisa tried to pull away but Karma held him by the hair.

He took a deep breath. And spat into Nagisa’s open mouth.

“I told you Nagisa. It’s not safe for little things like you to wander around alone. Perhaps we should always stay around you? Like body guards? Who would you like? Terasaka? Gakashuu? Or me?”

Nagisa heard the threat. Submit now or they’ll make him pay later. Stalk him all over school, all the way home. Whenever he left the house. No better form of entertainment for them. They’d do it too, he knew that. Karma’s saliva dripped down his chin. Still, when he stopped touching his face he wanted to learn closer. Karma never touched him like that when other people were around.

“I’m fine.”

“But I’m going to all this trouble for you? You should thank me anyway!”

He gritted his teeth. Karma raised his fist so...

“Thank you Karma.”

“Is that it? But I made such a generous offer! You really don’t want to say anything else?”  
Karma stepped back but blocked his escape casually with his arm. Really? He was going to make him beg for this?  
Of course he was.

Nagisa sucked it up and bowed from the waist.  
“Thank you for offering to guard me. I appreciate the generosity. But I don’t need bodyguards. I will not get into trouble. I will be good. Thank you.”

“Anything for my little baby Nagisa! My Nagisa won’t wander off alone again will he? You never know what will happen!”

He rested his hand on Nagisa’s shoulder, nails digging into his skin then shoved him back against the wall and sauntered out. It wasn’t too bad this time, but he still seethed Internally. Cursed at Karma’s back.  
Begging for the privilege of not being constantly watched? How generous.

He never called him Baby Nagisa when Terasaka and Gakashuu were present.  
Bitch, slut and even Shiota?Yes.  
Nagisa and baby? Not a chance.  
Even though all were meant as insults.

Why did Karma hate him so much? Karma made that call, started all of this. But Nagisa had hurt him too. That’s what stopped him from telling someone, calling the police in some cases. He had hurt his Karma and ruined everything.  
Maybe he deserved this.

He missed being Karma’s friend. Having Karma so close and not needing to flinch. Feeling safe around him. He wanted to safely lean against him again. Have Karma hold him close like he used to.

They used to have this special top secret spy game. It started when they were 10 so of course they called it their spy game. Climbing to each others windowsills and slipping inside. Secret sleepovers.

Board games, video games. Brought snacks when they were old enough to go to a shop. Eventually curling up next to each other on the floor, Karma’s sofa, Nagisa’s bed.

Lying on Karma’s back because he was so warm and Nagisa was always cold. Or Karma’s head on his belly so they made a T shape. Stroking Karma’s hair to keep away the nightmares.

Just lying side by side and waking up in a tangle of arms and legs and blankets.

Waking up and not needing to move. Listening to Karma’s breathing and being lulled back to sleep. Then they ruined it.

And he had to sleep alone.  
It was always cold at night now. And who kept Karma’s nightmares away? He knew he shouldn’t care. Old Karma wasn’t anything like New Karma.

Old Karma was mental yes, but sweet and warm and soft.  
New Karma wants fun, on his terms. Those terms were rarely fun for anyone else.

The next day Nagisa tried to follow along in Maths. The teacher always ignored questions and moved at the top students pace. Everyone else had to resort to random tutorials on YouTube. Totally worth the ridiculous tuition fees.

Karma sat at the back of class. Nagisa was several rows ahead. Bent towards his desk as usual but Karma still found it mesmerising.

Annoying. Annoying. Karma found it annoying. And pathetic. Because Nagisa was stupid, childish. He hadn’t accepted Karma’s help even though he had plainly needed it. Needed Karma.  
But he had pushed him away. Locked his window.

And Karma would never forgive him for it.

Nagisa had shaken like a leaf when Karma stood over him before. That feeling filled his bones with pleasure. Nagisa completely at his mercy. Having to take what ever Karma gave him. He licked his lips. Remembered Nagisa bowing, A mix of his and Karma’s spit coating his words. But when he left. That, that feeling. Ice coating his back as he walked away. Feeling like Nagisa was following him with a knife hidden in his sleeve. Feeling like Nagisa could kill him as easily as smiling.  
Whatever Nagisa did to cause that feeling, Karma would crush it out of him.

Today’s game would be even better. He nodded at Terasaka and Gakashuu on either side of him. Soon the bell would ring and his fun would begin.


	2. Chapter 2

Nagisa knew they were following him. Asano and Karma, heard their footsteps. They thought they were being discreet.

Just three more streets and he’d be home.  
They were getting closer so he didn’t dare turn around.

Just two more streets.  
Karma started laughing. He didn’t run, they’d kill him if he ran.

It’s was unusually empty for this time of day. Where were the mothers pushing prams? Kids coming home from school?  
Anyone who could stop what was going to happen.

A single old dirty car drove by, stopping near him. Great. A weirdo child snatcher being added into his day. But when the window rolled down, Terasaka grinned from the drivers seat.

This was a trap.

Immediately hands grabbed his arms, waist, hair.

He shrieked and kicked. His nails sunk into soft skin so he pulled, feeling something give, someone was bleeding.  
Asano yelling. Nagisa had hurt him? good he deserved it.  
Being picked up and thrown in the ground. No breath left so he lashed out with his fists and someone ties something around his wrists and they pin home down.  
Something tied around his legs and a towel used as a gag and he was thrown in the trunk of Terasakas car.  
He had A car?

And the trunk closed over his head leaving him in the dark.

Karma and Asano climbed into the back seats.

“Dads out all evening” he said smugly. “This baby’s ours for the day.”

“I feel like a burger, don’t you boys?” Said Karma sweetly. “Not like there’s anything we need to do.”

So off they drove.  
Nagisa tried pointlessly to free his arms, spit out the gag, something!

Nothing budged.  
And now the car was moving. Great.

They pulled up outside an old food restaurant and went in for their food. Karma glanced at the dessert case. Right in the middle were a dozen red velvet cupcakes.

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘒𝘢𝘳𝘮𝘢 𝘸𝘢𝘴 12 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘦𝘸 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘢 𝘣𝘪𝘳𝘵𝘩𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘺. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘥𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦. 𝘏𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘦𝘤𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘤.  
𝘏𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘦𝘤𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘤 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘪𝘯𝘷𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘴. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺.  
𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘢 𝘴𝘶𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘪𝘦. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘰𝘬.  
The 𝘤𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘥, 3 𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘙𝘦𝘦𝘤𝘦’𝘴 𝘱𝘪𝘦𝘤𝘦𝘴. They 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘨𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳, 𝘩𝘪𝘴, 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘺 𝘢 𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘵𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘵.

𝘒𝘢𝘳𝘮𝘢 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯’𝘵 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘤 𝘵𝘰 𝘯𝘶𝘵𝘴. 𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘵? 𝘐𝘵 wasn’t 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘺. 𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘪𝘯𝘷𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘕𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘴𝘢 𝘭𝘦𝘧𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘧 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩.

𝘒𝘢𝘳𝘮𝘢 𝘴𝘭𝘶𝘮𝘱𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘳𝘺. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵’𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘰𝘸.  
𝘕𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘴𝘢, 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘹 𝘰𝘧 𝘤𝘶𝘱𝘤𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴. 𝘙𝘦𝘥 𝘷𝘦𝘭𝘷𝘦𝘵, 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘌𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘴𝘬𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦, 𝘺𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴, 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘢𝘷𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦.

𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘣𝘪𝘳𝘵𝘩𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘥.

Karma snapped out of his thoughts and ordered his food quickly. Hid his discomfort in a mouthful of fry’s.

It made food feel special. The knowledge that, while they were eating comfortably, Nagisa was trapped in the hot car, unable to move. They were powerful.

Nagisa knew was pathetic. His legs ached and his shoulders burned. He’d been fighting back tears for..... who knows how long.  
Where where they? What were they doing? The car had stopped somewhere, and they left him. Now they were moving again and he thought he would die.

And then the trunk swung open, sun blinding him.

“Hey Bitch!” Sang Karma happily. “This is your stop!”

He gently traced a pen knife over Nagisa’s wrists before cutting him lose. Nagisa untied his feet while they laughed.

“Bye bye Nagisa!” Called Terasaka. “Don’t go telling anyone about this!”

“Of course not!” Said Nagisa, bearing his teeth sweetly. Terasaka stepped back, surprised.

“I wouldn’t call the police. That’s Karma’s job!” His eyes flicked to Karma, who bowed his head. He regretted that call everyday.

Nagisa ran while they were distracted.

When he got home his mother decided she found rope burn disgusting. So she treated his rope born with disgust

She scrubed his arms with hand lotion, so her pretty little darling would look perfect. When her pretty little darling did not respond with enthusiasm she simply twisted his wrists till they burned.  
  


“I know it was Karma.” Said his mother in his ear.  
  
She laughed at his flinch. 

“It’s your fault you know. If you stopped mopping over your little crush he’d get bored. Stop being such a submissive little dog and he’ll stop.”

Nagisa didn’t respond. Why bother? After all. He was just her submissive little dog. 


	3. Chapter 3

Karma lay on his bed staring at his ceiling. The bed was very empty beside him. He imagined Nagisa, curling up small beside him. His hands, always cold, stroking his hair. He was too hot, anger crawling across his skin like bugs.   
Why had Nagisa ruined it? Everything was perfect! And all Karma wanted to do was make it stay that way! But Nagisa wouldn’t take his help. Hed thrown it back in his face. Nagisa had locked his window. Treated Karma like dirt. Nagisa couldn’t function without him. Needed him. Nagisa was throwing away his chance of happiness like this. Didn’t he understand?   
Karma would never forgive him. He’d never let him forget. He knew Nagisa wouldn't fight back, not really. Not against him. Today they’d find out how far Nagisa would let him go. 

Nagisa bent over his desk. Ignored the boys staring at his back. Forced down the worry as he moved his sore wrists. They wouldn’t do something drastic today, not so soon after yesterday.   
Right? 

It happened on the way to math's. Karma sidling up behind him. Throwing his arm over his shoulder. Whispering into his ear.   
‘’Hello Nagisa Baby. Come quietly, won't you? You don’t want me to drag you, do you? You know I will.’’   
Nagisa felt himself melting into Karma. He was so close, Karma's chest warm against his back. Karma could kill him, he shouldn’t go. But he would drag him if he didn’t. Karma didn’t do empty threats. 

He bowed his head, let Karma pull him to the bathroom. Terasaka and Asano were waiting there. Grinning, delighted at his new game. Unable to contain themselves with excitement. Nagisa knows he’s their favorite toy. 

Karma pulls his arm from his shoulder, shoving him so he crashes into the wall. He tries to run so Karma shoves him back against the wall. He laces one hand next to Nagisa’s head, one on his hip. Back flat to the wall there was nowhere to hide, no way to duck. Karma leans close. His breath smells like icing sugar. 

‘We have a little job for you Nagisa.’’ he croons. ‘’Just a little one!’’   
Nagisa doesn't know where to look. He can't look over Kamras shoulder as the others are standing there. Karma grins as Nagisa’s eyes flicker nervously across the room.   
‘’Why so worried? You think we’d ever ask you to do something scary? It'll be so easy! All you have to do is slip into Sensei's office and grab next week's test papers. We shall read them, learn them, I'll even help you with what you don’t understand! And then, you can return them. I'm sure you won't get caught. If your careful that is. Won’t you do it? For me?’’   
He had come so close his lips were almost brushing against Nagisa’s ear. Nagisa had his eyes closed tight, he couldn’t look at Kamra, couldn’t look at the others. He heard them laughing, heard the confidence in Karma's voice.   
He shook his head.   
Karma's grip tightened on his him. His other hand grabbed Nagisa’s chin, yanking it up.   
‘’Open your eyes Nagisa. You really won't help me? I’d really appreciate it.’’   
He leant so his forehead touched Nagisa’s. He felt Nagisa’s sharp shuddering breaths on his face.   
‘’I could do something for you. Whatever you want Nagisa, name your price.’’   
Nagisa tried to shake his head, pull away, do something, anything! But he couldn’t move. Karma used his fingers to rub slow gentle circles on his sore hip.   
‘Nagisa?’’ he whispered. He tongue flicked against Nagisa’s ear, making him shiver. Slowly, slowly he pressed his lips to Nagisa’s neck. A trail of kisses, across his cheek and jaw till he was hovering over Nagisa’s mouth.   
‘’I’ll do whatever you want’’ he whispered and he was kissing him. Nagisa couldn’t stop shaking as Karma held his face in one hand, the other moving across his thigh. He opened his mouth to say..... he forgot as Karma licked the roof of his mouth. 

Nagisa shoved him hard. Kamra stumbled back, more from surprise than anything else. Nagisa covered his mouth with both hands, eyes wide and shaking. Asano and Terasaka doubled over with laughter.   
Karma gritted his teeth, glaring at him. Why was he angry? Nagisa could barely form a single thought. Why had he done that? Why in front of the others? He’d been so angry whenrumors had spread about them before. Why would he start them again?   
Terasaka blew him a kiss and he understood. Karma was proving Nagisa wanted it. Proving Nagisa would let his do whatever he wanted. Even this.   
Even worse it was true. He wanted Karma back, any Karma, even this one. He wanted him close always. 

In a sick way, his wish came true. Karma grabbed him by the collar and knocked his to the ground.   
In seconds they were holding him down. Karma lazily played with a red sharpie. 

‘’You make everything difficult, don’t you Nagisa? Why don’t you just give in? You just a little bitch you know.’’ 

Grinning he pulled up Nagisa shirt and scrawled the word on his stomach.   
‘’No!’’ hissed Nagisa as he lashed out at anything he could reach. Karma sneered, writing more. He moved to his arms, shoulders neck.   
He clawed at Karmas arms, Asano’s face. He kicked violently till Karma grabbed his face and held his face.   
‘’Careful Nagisa. We don’t want to stab your pretty little eyes out.’’   
Nagisa couldn’t move as Karma began on his forehead, across his mouth, cheek. Finally, almost lovingly, he finished on his eyelids.   
They stood, and Nagisa curled up small. This wasn't real. If he just closed his eyes tight it wouldn’t be real and they’d go away. If he closed his eyes tight, he’d wake up and be on Karma's couch and they’d laugh at his ridiculous nightmare and he’ be safe.   
Instead, Karma crouched, stroked his face.   
‘’You're welcome Nagisa. Now you'll always remember what you are.’’   
They left him crumpled on the floor, words covering his skin like bleeding scars.   
Nagisa pulled himself up and looked in the mirror. It was all over him.   
Bitch   
Freak   
Slut   
On his forehead Karma spelt out “Deviant“.   
Across his mouth, “Liar.”  
On his cheek, “traitor.”  
Across both his eyes in tiny neat writing, “mine”   
He buried his face in his hands and let himself cry.


End file.
